Playing God

Dear family, as I happily sit in the college lounge with a mouthful of Hot Pocket and Dr. Pepper, there is a dark cloud of death hovering above me . (Wow. They should pay me for these product plugs.)

Actually, it's a Lean Pocket and usually it's diet Dr. Pepper mixed with regular. So maybe it's only going to sort of kill me.

Speaking of things that will only sort of kill me, I've discovered a way to make the death cloud move farther away, and the dark forces trying to murder me have become enraged.

In short, this is about a smoothie filled with painfully healthy things that still taste painfully delicious. Guaranteed to make your colon shoot rainbows. Maybe.

Super Smoothie of Super Justice:
It makes 2 servings. 2 Justice-Sized Servings.

.75 ounces spinach, I buy this in leafy-form and then freeze it.
.25 ounces alfalfa sprouts, wash this well so you don't die.
2.5 cups mixed berries, frozen
1/3 cup carrot juice
1/3 cup nectarine, frozen (can substitute with any similar fruit)
1 banana, frozen
6 medium strawberries, frozen
2 cups tea or water (I use decaf unsweetened green tea)
1/4 cup nonfat Greek yogurt
2 tablespoons pumpkin puree
1 tablespoon ground Flaxseed (optional)
1 oz acai juice (also optional, but it is tasty...)

Don't do this all at once, unless you have a blender powered by the powers of hell. And I happen to know that you do not. As a rule of thumb I blend leafy things and then things with skin first, using a little bit of the liquids at a time. Add more water if it's too thick. The universe will not explode.

Do taste this before serving, if by chance it isn't quite right play around with it. Adding berries and banana is generally a good way to go. Come on people, this is an art, not a science!

I've included nutrition facts. I am so sweet!
Take note though, the acai juice (which y'all probably didn't use anyways) is not included.

Nutrition Facts:
________________________

Calories 218

Total Fat 2.5g

Saturated Fat 0.6g

Trans Fat 0.0g

Cholesterol 1%

Sodium 2%

Total Carbohydrates 16%

Dietary Fiber 44%

Sugars 28.2g

Protein 4.2g

Vitamin A 132% • Vitamin C 130% Calcium 12% • Iron 12%

Nutrition Grade A

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet